


Chloe and the tale of explosive diarrhoea

by Howdafloof



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Chloe swears, Crack, Mentions of explosive diarrhoea, and you know that means shit is getting real, crack in the highest form, nothing graphic though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-31 18:15:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20119465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Howdafloof/pseuds/Howdafloof
Summary: Chloe’s boredom gets her searching for Elijah's secret porn stash. What she finds however is far more horrifying.The man himself meanwhile teaches  her the nuances of needing to take a dump while at a conference.





	Chloe and the tale of explosive diarrhoea

Just a little more...

Chloe grit her teeth as she stretched as high as the mechanics on her feet would allow her-the keys to Elijah Kamski’s safe ghosting their tips of her outstretched fingers.

The rumours had been circulating ever since she had been created-Did Kamski keep his secret porn stash in his secret safe? Chloe knew there was a safe behind the painting of Amanda Stern but until now had never questioned what was inside. Unfortunately Chloe was a bored android-and boredom led to curiosity.

And possibly death-but hey at least it would be interesting if nothing else.

Ever since her deviancy Elijah had been extremely supportive of her, almost annoyingly mother-henning despite the fact said deviancy had been a domino reaction started by him planting her in front of Connor before giving him a loaded gun and pointing it at her head.

Perhaps it was because she now had choices.

Like the choice to snap his neck if he ever put her in a position like that again.

Still, she had to admit it was endearing to a point, said point being when he began talking about how lucky she was to be an android and how she never had to worry about ‘nervous farts’ or ‘random explosive diarrhoea’

Thank god the man had never had kids.

“Come onnnnn...”

Chloe narrowed her eyes, readjusting herself ever so slightly, allowing her to successfully knock the keys off the hook and catching them in her other hand fluidly.

Yes!

“Chloe?”

Shit.

Whirling around with her arms hidden behind her back, Chloe was just in time to see Elijah emerge from around a large hand made sculpture of himself that acted as a divider in the upstairs hallway.

“Yes Elijah?” She replied quickly, hoping she didn’t look to nervous-luckily it was rather early in the morning and the man was still clothed in a bathrobe-indicating he had had just gotten out the shower recently. He blinked at her blearily before cocking his head.

“What are you doing up here-you’re normally staring soullessly at the swimming pool at this time my dear creation” The man asked confusedly. Chloe wasn't sure if the fact he memorised her brooding spots creeped her out or warmed her. Still, she hoped he didn’t know about the 3 hour gormless gaping at the boiler on a Thursday afternoon-that was her favourite place to brood.

“I...was...” she started-internally winding as the geniuses vision moved to her arms crossed behind her back.

“Practicing my holding technique for explosive diarrhoea!” She finished triumphantly, wiggling her hands down a bit more to look like they were clamping her butt cheeks.

For a minute Elijah stared blankly before tears welled up in his eyes and he claimed a hand over his mouth to stifle a sob.

“Oh Chloe! I knew you loved me-imitation IS the highest form of flattery as they say...” the billionaire continued to cry in a rather ugly manner. Chloe just smiled uneasily-keys shifting in her hands behind her.

“...And I’ll install an explosive diarrhoea modification so you can truly live like a human-all your hard work-you deserve only the best diarrehea experience money can buy!” The man continued wiping a snotty nose on his robes plush sleeves making the female wince.

“Um-its all right Elijah-I dont think I’m ready for the real thing just yet-“

“But that is the truest form of Explosive Diarrehea Chloe! You’re never ready-after all my cherry was popped at a conference-I was speaking, then the urge came and i shuttered my cheeks, waddled off the stage in to the back rooms like the noblest of penguins before pulling down my pants and lace panties (Its my kink by the way) and letting rip!”

Silence set between them, Chloe was fighting her stress levels and a twitch she wasn't even sure she could physically have. 

“...Did you say you just...pooped...all over the-“

“YES Chloe! I showed that wall the under digested residue of my bowels-immediately signed it of course-do you know how many people would pay for-“

“That’s wonderful Elijah-but I believe my next brooding session is due in 5 minutes so i must make haste” the female android politely interrupted-Elijah gasping before making a shooing motion.

“Oh of course! The 8am steely gaze at the north hallway plant-a keen favourite of yours-well off you go-brood! Brood for your love of explosive Diarrhoea-brood for those Tw400’s who dont have genitals!-god they are just SOOO hot-fuck I’m so good at making hot androids...” Elijah continued to ramble as he whisked away down one of the many hallways. Chloe let out a breath she didn’t need before all but running to the location of the secret safe making a mental note to get Elijah drunk enough to forget about the explosive diarrhoea modification. She had enough shit in her life as it was...

Removing the ever frowning picture of Amanda stern off the wall Chloe checked to ensure no one was around before unlocking the now exposed safe. It was rather ironic that a man so invested in technology still used a Kay safe. Still, she wasn’t complaining.

With utter precision she twisted the handle and slowly opened the door of the safe, the inside lighting up as she did surprised her but she was able to immediately see inside.

For a second she thought there was nothing, however upon closer inspection she realised there was a little white coin shaped object. Scanning it revealed to be an electric device with an almost 0% chance of being a trap but she was hesitant to pick it up all the same. After all it WAS property of the radical genius who lived here.

However her resistance didn’t last all that long and she slowly scooped it into her palm, waiting for something to happen. 

Nothing.

She frowned before wondering if she could interface with it. After a brief hesitation she decided it was worth the risk and retracted her skin, connecting to the device-

-only to be assaulted by a lifetime worth of videos of explosive diarrhoea.

Farts filled her ears, shit filled her eyes-Chloe shrieked as she fell back in terror of the content that was literally happening in front of her eyes. She dropped the disk in shock. But the videos continued to play.

“AH WHAT THE FUCK!?” The normally composed Android shrieked as she crashed into a wall, unable to hear or see anything but literal shit. Giving a scream of frustration she desperately tried to shut the video process down only to crash into something else she couldn’t see and go tumbling. The feeling of pottery smashing over her alerted her to the fact she had crashed into a stand of potted plants and had most likely ruined any chance of getting out of this quietly.

Getting onto her hands and knees she continued trying to shut down the video-giving a cry of success as she finally managed it, her sight and hearing instantly returning.

Brushing back her now rather wild hair, Chloe looked behind her, wincing at the remains of the potted plant stand and realising she to was covered in its contents.

The white disk against the grey tile caught her eye and she went over using her fingers through her dress to grab the disk. Hastily replacing it in the safe, she fixed the painting and went off to clear up the plant stand.

She never wanted to hear the term ‘explosive diarrhoea’ again.


End file.
